Fort Collins to Fireworks Lovers: It’s Time for Peace and Quiet
Dear Fireworks-Loving Neighbor,
Today is July 12th, officially eight days after Independence Day. Yet still, every night and sometimes very, very late or even the MIDDLE of the night, we're still hearing you somewhere near our houses: "pop, pop, pop-pop-pop, sizzle... scream."
Yeah, I'm looking at you, "fireworks people."
Generally speaking it's the people who drive up to Wyoming and blow a paycheck on as many different kind of fireworks they can get their hands on who are still lighting them each night a full eight days after the 4th of July, as if the signers of the Declaration of Independence were still celebrating at this point in 1776. No, they had to return to work already. We do too.
The 4th is all good. Most people expect it. You turn on all the lights, turn up the TV full blast and lock your dogs in the bedroom so they can't escape. Did you know that the 4th of July is the number one day dogs go missing? Well, now you do!
Even in the days leading up to the holiday, the excitement is real and almost excusable. If you love fireworks - and believe me, so do I - I understand that temptation to fire them off. And I also understand that you spent all your hard earned money on all kinds of stuff that maybe you didn't get to over the long holiday weekend. But, it's time to let them go this year. Simply put, your neighbors are tired of your nonsense.
They'll still be good around New Year's eve, if you're so inclined. In fact, long as you store them in a cool, dry place, they'll even make it to NEXT 4th of July, or even the 250th anniversary of our Independence Day, set to happen in 2026.
For the love of all things holy, please - just, please - let the rest of us get some uninterrupted sleep at some point this month.
Signed with love,
The rest of the City of Fort Collins
PS - You and I both know that a lot of the fireworks you're lighting off are illegal in the State of Colorado. Sure, it's not as dry as usual which makes them thankfully less threatening to start fires, but still illegal. You should have a look at what those fines might run you if you're caught, which you almost certainly will be, seeing as you're only one of a few still setting them off.